Poem - "When your momma can't save you"

 Published in 2020 in Black Radiance (isn't a filter) by Emeka Barclay

Available for purchase here.

stained glass image of tyre nichols skateboarding
This week isn't a lesson.  This week is a response to what we all are so very tired of seeing and experiencing.  I made myself do it.  I made myself watch the video. The video of a man's last breath and his call to his momma.  I broke.  I mean, how do you emotionally recover from that? No!!  How do you participate in that?  How do you not feel haunted?  I feel haunted. TI felt haunted after George Floyd.  Aren't we tired of being haunted by the ghost cries to mommas.  Those of us personally affected are exhausted and wary of being afraid.  Those of us peripheral to it all are weary and expectant of being exhausted.  We weep.  We wail.  We wait.  Change must come because we are long past being able to afford the cost.  I felt the need to post this here.  We can talk about it later.  For now, remember the sound of a child's cry.  Let is haunt you like it haunts their mothers.

When your momma can't save you 

once I hurt so bad that
my breath caught in the back of my throat
the void filling and no air escaping
until a cacophony of anguish
and a skin-peeling squeal so deep that it
reached back to my momma's womb
back to when my kicking
caught her breath and rubbing her belly
calmed me
once I hurt so bad that
I cried for my momma
to come for me
to collect me
to comfort me
because my momma could always save me.
my momma made
superhero type moves
she could stop the sun from shining too bright
and then force it to give me light
she could heal any hurt or pain I felt or give
me direction with the soft correction she dealt
she could set the stars in the nighttime sky
and make them twinkle and dance a lullaby
for me,
my momma would give her last
take the breath from her body
and save me
So,
when he called for his momma
good mommas remembered how a child's first
breath
in the womb
took her breath and gave her
a calling and a strength
with his last breath caught in the back
of his crushed throat
he called for his momma to save him
he called for his momma
he called for my momma
and he desperately called your momma
but nobody's momma could
save him.

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